George Michael, Gay? No Way!
Posted on | April 7, 2008 | No Comments
I’m watching some old George Michael videos right now and shaking my head, wondering how it is that people didn’t know he was gay back in his heyday. I remember people in my high school debating it and wishing that people would just shut up about the topic of “gay” altogether. I was still struggling with my own gayitudinousness.
Anyway, my point is that George Michael was a fucking flamer, man! He pranced around the stage like a fairy on a trampoline, covered in glitter, and shooting flames out of his ass. Tra la friggin’ la! *dainty hand gesture*
I was seriously pondering this until I remembered that the ’80s were full of “hair bands” and guys who wore makeup, etc. It was the thing to do if you were a performer. It was all big feathered hair, flashy clothes, man-scara, and eyebrow sculpting. Oh, man, this reminds me of, what I used to call, “The Poof”. Girls in my high school, and probably every high school around the world, would pull all of their hair back into a pony tail with the exception of their bangs which they would convert into a mini hairspray-laden Afro poised above their brows, always at the ready to either burst into flames at the slightest hint of a wayward spark, or to attack nearby innocent bystanders. It was essentially a Tribble eating their brain.
It was always a great effort for me to not point and laugh, but I really had no room to criticize since my hair went from being a bowl cut one year to having really long bangs, down to my chin, longer on one side of my head than on the other, the following year. One side shaved, the other side flowing down the side of my head like drapes in a sleazy motel room. Okay, maybe a fancy motel room. One that doesn’t charge by the hour. You know, one of them fancy Motel 6s or something. Swanky like that.
God, I miss the ’80s. They were, like, totally awesome! Totally tubular, man! Like, not even a gag me with a spoon thing. You know?
Related posts:
- John Mayer, a Cold, and “It Looks Gay”
- I’m glad you aren’t flamboyantly gay…
- Tagged by tisoi from LiveJournal
- Gay Marriage Still Outlawed in Washington
- A Gay Prediction
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