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REFERENDUM 71

Ballot Title
Statement of Subject: The legislature passed Engrossed Second Substitute Senate Bill 5688 concerning rights and responsibilities of state-registered domestic partners [and voters have filed a sufficient referendum petition on this bill].

Concise Description: This bill would expand the rights, responsibilities, and obligations accorded state-registered same-sex and senior domestic partners to be equivalent to those of married spouses, except that a domestic partnership is not a marriage.

Should this bill be:

Approved ___
Rejected ___

Ballot Measure Summary
Same-sex couples, or any couple that includes one person age sixty-two or older, may register as a domestic partnership with the state. Registered domestic partnerships are not marriages, and marriage is prohibited except between one man and one woman. This bill would expand the rights, responsibilities, and obligations of registered domestic partners and their families to include all rights, responsibilities, and obligations granted by or imposed by state law on married couples and their families.

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I went back to Facebook to bitch that I couldn’t go and that I was bummed and Brenda suggested inviting them. Duh! Why didn’t I think of that? Our plans for that weekend were to include a couple other friends of mine, one of whom, Erik, I know likes Def Leppard. I posted an invite to them all, via Facebook, and my friend who I knew liked Def Leppard, replied pretty quickly, excitedly saying he wanted to go. I told him we have to wait to make sure that my friends from Marysville, Dani and Neal, wanted to go. So, I stared intently at my Facebook, waiting for a reply from one or both of them. No reply.

Danielle is usually up pretty late and tinkering around on Facebook nearly as late into the evening as I am, but this night, of course, she’s nowhere to be found. I eventually went to bed and, in the morning, sent her a text message asking if she was interested. Once she woke all the way up she and Neal decided that they wanted to go too. I mean, $10! How can you beat that?

Erik had told me that he’d be at work all day so he wouldn’t be able to get his tickets but asked that I get a couple for him and his boyfriend, Darren, and he’d pay me back. I agreed and ordered my three tickets while Danielle and Neal ordered theirs.

Next, I decided to ask my cousin, Bart, if he and his girlfriend, Roni, wanted to go too. Bart likes that old ’80s rock, so I was pretty certain he’d want to go. Roni likes death metal, so he may be dragging her, kicking and screaming. Oddly enough Bart called me just after I got off the phone with Danielle (who had called me when she got tired of texting). He called me about something unrelated but I told him about the sale and asked if he wanted to go. He did but was at work and couldn’t get the tickets yet. He asked me to get them but after spending the money on mine, Erik’s, and Darren’s… and ordering myself a Def Leppard t-shirt and hoodie, I didn’t think I could afford another $20 for his and Roni’s tickets. He was okay with that and said he’d order them when he gets home.

This morning Bart confirmed that they have their tickets so, I’m excited to report that the seven of us will be going to see Def Leppard and Poison at the White River Amphitheater in Auburn on September 12th! This is going to be so cool! As a kid I never went to any concerts, except one at the fair grounds, which was Huey Lewis and the News. Going to this concert will be kind of like making up for all of the missed concerts as a kid. And having a big group of friends with me will make it even better.

Oh, and completely off topic, I never followed up on my previous post about my health. On the 8th of this month I was diagnosed as diabetic, as I had expected. My blood sugar had gotten up to 480 when they did that glucose test and the nurse called me just before midnight on the 7th. She called my doctor who asked me to come in on the 8th, and I got the diagnosis. He put me on Metformin, a diabetes medication, and some medications for blood pressure and cholesterol, and so far my blood sugar levels have been pretty normal, averaging around 120 or so. I’ve also managed to lose a little weight by having changed my diet and getting a bit of exercise in, here and there. So… there’s that.

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When drinking a lot of liquids you also have to urinate a ton. Drink, piss, drink, piss… I was going to the restroom every hour, if not more frequently. I didn’t think too much of this though. I have had times where I have drank a lot of liquids before and eventually I get back to normal. Though, in hind sight, this was even worse than other times.

On Saturdays I usually go over to my cousin’s house and we play World of Warcraft and hang out. This time we postponed it to Tuesday. I woke up on Tuesday, feeling fine, took my shower, dressed, took my asthma medicine, and left for Bart’s house. Just before I left I started feeling a little wonky and my vision just slightly started to blur.

While at my cousin’s house, I just couldn’t get motivated to do much of anything. I couldn’t focus my vision on anything more than a few feet in front of me. I was not, and am not, blind, but it was, and is, difficult to read anything or make out details. I didn’t have any trouble driving, other than being unable to read license plates or signs. It’s unnerving to have this crop up out of the blue. I just got my glasses a few months ago.

When I got home from Bart’s it was early, early Wednesday. I woke my mom up and explained to her that I’ve been drinking a lot, pissing a lot, and that my vision had blurred. We both mentioned diabetes. She doesn’t remember parts of the conversation now, though. I checked the American Diabetic Association website and found the list of symptoms:

• Frequent urination
• Excessive thirst
• Extreme hunger
• Unusual weight loss
• Increased fatigue
• Irritability
• Blurry vision

On Wednesday afternoon I called my doctor’s office and set up an appointment and, today, Thursday, I went in at 9:15 AM to see if my doctor could tell if it was diabetes or, hopefully, something less life-altering (or life-threatening). When I eventually got called into the smaller waiting room, as apposed to the large one where they make you wait to wait, I was told that a medical student was shadowing my doctor and I was asked if I would mind if the student was present. I had no problem with that.

The nurse left the room, after asking me what all I was there for, and I began waiting… again. I’m not sure if I mentioned this earlier but I have been lethargic the last few days and tired as Hell. I very much wanted to curl up on that bench thing and fall asleep, but resisted the urge.

Eventually the student came in, without my doctor, and he started asking me all of the questions, including why I was there today… Okay, let me take a brief moment to bitch about why it is that the nurse asks you why you are there, writes it all down in the notes, and then the doctor asks you the same shit. Seriously! Patients don’t want to be at the doctor’s office at all. Please be more efficient and don’t force me to repeatedly explain what’s wrong with me. Okay?

Now, back on track. So, the student guy asks me what’s up and I explain that I suspect that I may be diabetic, or that I am at least showing the symptoms and would like to know what’s up. He asked some of the same questions twice, which told me he wasn’t really listening. He also seemed nervous. Now, I get that doctors need to be trained but I don’t want that done at the expense of my health. I would have been fine if my doctor was in there while this was going on, but he was off jerking off in the hall, or something. Lucky for everyone involved, the student was cute. Unlucky for me, he was wearing a wedding band.

The student guy didn’t seem to listen when I told him that I had just gone to the optometrist and just got these glasses about five months ago. He would try to repeat what I had said, to make sure he had it straight, and he would say things like, “So, your old glasses don’t work any more?” I’d then calmly tell him, “No, these glasses are new and my vision has gotten bad in only a few days.” Actually, I goofed up when I talked to the doctors and I told them my vision had been going bad over the last few weeks, but it’s only been a few days.

So, the student tells me, after he eventually gets everything straight, that he thinks I have diabetes. My thought, nice bedside manner. He then wanted to take a quick look in my eyes using some sort of… eye-ball-oscope-thingy. Before doing so he asks me what my vision is like. I say, “Um, I don’t know, what do you mean, like, nearsighted/farsighted?” He mumbles something and I tell him that I’m nearsighted. He then asked me what my prescription is. Who the Hell knows their vision prescription? Come on!

Anyways, he makes a failed effort to look into both of my eyes and, as he’s all up-close and personal, I resist making a joke about him trying to kiss me. Eventually he leaves to consult with my doctor (THANK YOU!) and a while later they both re-enter the room. The doctor says he reviewed everything and tells me about a test that he’d like me to take in which I have to fast for 12 hours (the student told me it would be 24 hours) and come in to the lab area and tell them that I was there for a fasting glucose test, or some-such. I can’t remember the exact wording. I’ll probably do that on Friday. I want to nip this in the bud before things get worse.

Oh, I asked the student if I should go to an eye doctor to make sure everything is okay or if I should wait until we know the results of the tests and such. He suggested I see the eye doctor as soon as possible. I’ve set up an appointment for next Wednesday. My doctor also suggested that I see a sleep specialist to see if I have sleep apnea and gave me a referral for an ear, nose, and throat specialist for a consultation on my deviated septum. I guess they just want to rule out sleep apnea as a reason for me being lethargic. I explained that I wake up a lot because my mouth dries out in my sleep because I end up breathing through my mouth – one of my meds also dries my mouth out – so I wake up a lot to take a drink of something.

Well, I’ve cut fast food out of my diet and sugary drinks, like soda, are gone too. I was drinking a lot of orange juice over the last couple of days but the med student told me that orange juice has a lot of sugar in it. Anyways, I finally found some water that doesn’t have added minerals “for flavor.” *scoff* I bought some of those little packets of sugar free drink mix which are portioned for 16.9 oz water bottles. They aren’t bad, but I’m missing my Coke.

Anyways, so, here’s the rundown in short: Eyes are fucked up so I’m avoiding driving as much as possible. Doctors need to do more testing to see what’s up. as far as diabetes goes. I’m making dietary improvements. I may call the ear, nose, and throat specialist tomorrow for a consultation. I’d love to fix the deviated septum (and if they could fix the bump on my nose, I wouldn’t complain). And my eye doctor appointment is next Wednesday.

The only good thing out of all of this is that, just a few weeks ago, I applied for medical insurance, which I haven’t had since I was laid off in December. Without the medical insurance, I don’t know how much, of this, if any, I could afford. So, thank goodness for medical insurance!

I’ll keep you all up-to-date as much as possible.

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One of the topics discussed was whether it is a choice or not. I have to be honest and say that I’m tired of that question. As usual, the straight person felt that it was a choice. The gay person felt he was born this way. Has anyone ever stopped to wonder why all of the people who feel it’s a choice are straight? What experience do straight people have with the topic to even warrant having an opinion on the matter strong enough to tell another person that, “You, sir, chose to be the way that you are.” He didn’t actually say that, I just added that for effect.

We didn’t choose to be gay any more than you chose to be straight.

As I mentioned in my comment to the blog post, here’s my take on it: I didn’t choose to be gay. Far from it. I started getting an inkling that I am gay around the sixth grade. I was in utter denial about it until probably around the 11th grade. I went through all of the typical denial stages: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. Well, I may have skipped the Anger part of that. At least I don’t recall being angry at anyone about it. I mostly remember the Bargaining stage. I did everything from repeatedly praying to God, saying that I’d be good and do anything I was supposed to do as long as He made me straight, to flipping coins and telling myself that one side meant I was straight and the other meant I was gay. Unfortunately, that only gave me 50/50 results (no, I’m not bisexual). By around the ninth or tenth grade (or my second sophomore year) I was going through the Depression stage. People who went to school with me may remember me as being a bit of a loner, sitting off by myself all the time and being pretty quiet, for the most part. The depression was one of the primary reasons for this.

Where, in any of that, could anyone get the idea that I chose to be gay? I do feel that we are born with a predisposition to becoming gay, which would typically manifest around puberty. I can’t say “born gay,” really, because we aren’t really born as sexual beings. You can’t really call a baby “gay,” or a five year old “gay,” (or even “straight”) but you may see some hints that the child will end up gay. He may do some of the stereotypical things, like playing with Barbies or having no interest in sports; he may just seem effeminate. He may show no signs at all, but if he’s got that predilection, it will eventually manifest.

There are some people who seem to become gay later in life. I have no personal experience with this other than to say that I did date girls in, and shortly after, high school, but I wasn’t sexually attracted to them. I simply didn’t know how to decline their offer to go out. To be clear, though, I’ve never had sex with a woman. My suspicion with the people who jump the fence later on in life is that they may have just been in denial for a longer time, perhaps due to familial influences to behave a certain way, or for religious reasons. They may have always been bisexual but didn’t reveal that aspect to anyone. Alfred Kinsey believed sexuality to be fluid and that people could flow from gay to straight, and everything in between, over the years. That hasn’t been the case for me, but who’s to say it couldn’t be the case for someone else? Again, this still isn’t a choice, any more than you choose to like Coke instead of Pepsi.

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Note: There is some nudity in these so it likely is NSFW.

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Though I don’t enjoy that Perez Hilton was attacked, or whatever happened to him, I do enjoy his whining video about it. It was rather reminiscent of videos which he’s made fun of in the past. Chris Crocker, of “Leave Britney Alone” fame, comes to mind while watching it.

Poor Perez… Mario, whatever.

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I’d like to start off by saying that the term “Sexual Preference” needs to be removed from the lexicon. It is a misnomer. Preference implies that I’ve tried both and could go one way or the other but I’d prefer to go this route, rather than that route. “Sexual Attraction” would be more accurate. I’ve never been with a woman and I have no intention of doing so. My attraction is solely directed toward men.

Next, let me go on a bit of a tirade: Gay Marriage… For the life of me I can not understand why anyone would be against gay marriage. Most opponents of it cite religious reasons for their lack of acceptance – that gay sex is a sin and therefor should not be condoned. Alright, let’s say gays buggering each other is a sin. Personally, I have no religious beliefs, other than the believe that religion is all poppycock. So, why, then, should your belief that it is a sin have any bearing on what I do? Oh, that’s right, because your religion deems what is appropriate for all of humanity, not just for those in your particular faith. It’s been pointed out countless times that Leviticus, the book typically used to argue against men lying with men as they do with women, also forbids the consumption of shellfish, among other regular everyday activities which people are all perfectly okay with (for the most part). Since I have very little knowledge of the Bible, I won’t go into that, and it’s already been done to death… a death likely caused by stoning.

I was recently reading some comments posted on a “Traditional Marriage” group on Facebook which my friend, Erik pointed out to me. One comment I read was from a man who claimed that allowing gays to marry would ultimately lead to the government forcing churches to marry two men or two women even if it is against the beliefs of their religion. This is pure propaganda. There has never been any suggestion, of which I am aware, that would indicate that the government would force churches to perform ceremonies against their will. This is preposterous. Obviously we still have this thing called the First Amendment in the the Constitution which separates church from state. It says, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.” The main part of that which is relevant to this is “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.” So, there goes that argument, buddy.

Marriage is not simply a religious ceremony, you narrow-minded religious Bible-thumpers! There are numerous rights afforded to married couples which are not afforded to same sex couples. Religious ceremonies don’t provide rights, government red tape does!

I just don’t get it. Is it purely hate or are these people really just so mind-numbingly stuck in follower mode that they can’t think apart from what their church tells them? They listen to all of the propaganda which tells them that allowing gays to marry will cause them to have to put up with gay teachers forcing their students to read “Heather Has Two Mommies.” As if parents have never had the right to protest certain books from being read to their children. I’ve never read that book but I doubt that it’s horridly inappropriate for children, but it may be inappropriate for smaller children. In any case, I can’t think of a reason why it would be read in schools… nor can I think of how gay marriage has anything to do with a teacher reading a book to students.

Then they claim that us gays will start recruiting children into the gay lifestyle. For Pete’s sake. We have no need to recruit. Have you seen how many people are in attendance at a gay pride rally or parade? There is no shortage of queer folk. I was raised by a straight mother and an absent, but straight father. Their orientation had no bearing on what I grew up to be. But I’m not the best example, having only been raised by my mother. But I do know of numerous gay men who were raised by straight couples who remained together. If our opponents’ logic was impeccable, and the orientation of couples would determine the orientation of their offspring then there would be no instance of homosexuality since only a straight couple would procreate. Clearly there is no bearing. Please stop using this argument.

Have you ever seen old propaganda material: pamphlets, videos, etc, from the WWII days, provided by Hilter and his ilk? Their statements and method of delivery seems oddly similar to that of the Religious Right’s method of keeping the LGBT community at bay. I’m just saying… Think about it.

Oh, look, the National Organization for Marriage exploits children, who likely have no clue what they are talking about, in an attempt to further their cause: http://www.afterelton.com/blog/dennis/nom-ad-kids-say-the-darndest-things

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Nearly every gay-themed book I’ve purchased has been through Amazon.com, though not recently. I’ve purchased numerous gay-themed movies from there as well. I find it hard to believe that they would suddenly go homophobic. I also find it difficult to believe that they would express their homophobia by hiding this material, rather than just removing it altogether.

People commenting on this quoted item in the community are demanding that Amazon.com apologize. I’m not a fan of company apologies. They always come across to me as just being a good business move, rather than a genuine apology. They want answers too, even though they’ve already been given one. It was an error, possibly due to a language barrier issue.

Here’s the thing, as I see it. I’ve incorrectly categorized my own blog entries before. It’s not difficult to put a check in the wrong box. It’s really easy to do. Trust me. Having worked with web design and maintenance, as well as with databases I can completely grasp the possibility that this was an honest mistake. On the off chance that this was some homophobic Amazon.com employee’s plot to bring down the evil LGBT community, I can’t blame Amazon.com as a whole. They’re making an effort to repair the problem, assuming it hasn’t already been corrected.

Quit crying foul at the drop of a hat, people. Take a deep breath. Take an assessment of the situation. What facts do you know and what hearsay have you heard? I’ve utilized Amazon.com too much to believe they’ve gone to the dark side. Everyone is so on guard about being discriminated against that they are crying wolf and pointing fingers even before all of the facts are in. They are pre-judging others. Isn’t prejudice what we’re really against?

Get-the fuck-over it. It was a God damn error. In the unlikely event that it was something malicious, Amazon.com is no more to blame for it than Dominos was to blame for two assholes, giving you snotty, flatulent cheese in your pizza.

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